Simon "Sneaksy" Sausageworth

"How the fuck did I get hold of £500'000 worth of weed?"


When he was a young boy his rich parents, Thomone and Martaela Sausageworth took him to the opera, however when they inexplicably decided to walk down a dark allyway they were unsurprisingly attacked by a thief who shot and killed both of Simon’s parents. Now alone in the world, other than his trusty butler Alfaedo Ironfists he resolved to take up the mantle of that he feared most; thieves. He trained for many years and became an expert in arts of sneaksing, with Alfaedo caring for him in Sausageworth Manor, however when he was sixteen his parents fortune was lost because of some corporate stuff; he was evicted and Alfaedo Ironfists was arrested trying to sell £500,000 worth of weed to an undercover policeman.

For the first time, he was truly alone and penniless on the streets. However, with his mastery of thieving he was able to make his way in the criminal underworld; having been a rich and fancy bloke he was well educated and knew a lot about all sorts of valuable objects and his sneaksy training allowed him to apply this knowledge to unlawful enterprises, in five short years he had gained quite a reputation; or rather his alias “The Hatman” did, for he always wore a large hat and a high collar longcoat that concealed his features when conducting his transactions so as never to be recognised. He never once killed anyone in pursuit of his ends, not like the thief who murdered his parents, he always spent months planning the robbery perfectly and one day an item of value would simply disappear without a trace.

However, one day he made a mistake and was identified by the authorities after being sold out by his friend and partner Judas “The Snitch” Jefferson. He eluded capture, however Portsmouth was beginning to get a little too hot to hold him, however he sees an opportunity to escape until things have died down in Ronin Mintman, a captain looking for a skilled crew to take down an underworld smuggling ring. A man with a vendetta, a man not too picky about who it is he accepts help from. A man who may just see the use of an individual with the skills and contacts possessed by… The Hatman.

Now Captain of the Varuna, Ronin looks to call upon his old acquaintance once more. The Hatman has been keeping his enterprise on the downlow since that day, however on the Varuna he sees an opportunity. An opportunity to break his old friend and mentor Alfaedo Ironfists from jail and retrieve the large stash of marijuana and gold hidden below Sausageworth Manor, if only he can convince his new crew to help him.

Simon "Sneaksy" Sausageworth

The Varuna Voyages TheFlayed TheFlayed